Somebody wished for the Nine Noble Virtues in LOLcat.
Why do those impulses always strike me late at night? Why, Ceeling Cat, why?
The Odinic Rite lists the 9 Noble Virtues as Courage, Truth, Honor,
Fidelity, Discipline, Hospitality, Industriousness, Self-Reliance, and
Dogz may bark, n flash feerful fang
but honor-stiffnd Kitteh standz firm.
Knowing Kitteh knowz. Knowz self,
knowz trooth, an clingz with claws of WANT.
Catnip mousies rip, an nomnomnoms evenshully come 2 bottm of bag
But I knowz wun thing wut never runz out:
teh name-fame wut comez when honrable cat is honrable.
CAN HAS, sez Kitteh. But Kitteh must keep:
Keep word, keep faith, keep clawz sharp.
Mai strong will. Let me show u it.
I honez it regyoolurly on the bonez of temptashun.
Sharing cat is sharing, strong in guest-frendship.
If I had 2 catnip mousies, I wud give u wun.
I see wut you did there. Ur latchez n doorz, I skoff at them.
I'm in ur precaushuns. An I has ALL DAY.
I has a flavor. Mai flavor iz bein able 2 depend on mahself.
SPACE AND TIME ARE NO OBSTACLE TO CATTANK. CATTANK IS STRONG.
Oh hai, I upgraded ur everything. Or I will.
Just give me tiem. Perseverance. I has it.
The Nine Noble LOLvirtues is copyright Elise Matthesen 2008; please do not reprint or repost without written permission. Permission can be gotten pretty easily by sending e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org. (I almost always say yes, but I love to find out how far it's spreading, and the permissions thing is good as a device to satisfy my curiosity on that.) Thank you. (And if you do reprint or repost without asking me, please please please include this paragraph so that my name and contact info go along with it so that the next person can ask, and I can find out how far it goes. If you see it out there anywhere uncredited, please tack this paragraph on. My catly curiosity thanks you.)
OK, I feel better for having gotten that taken care of, at least for now.
Honour Your Inner Magpie
- uh-oh (writing department) - The Nine Noble Virtues